Reflections on my family

I adore Christmas, as previously stated. This was one of my favorites. First of all, I am thinner than I have been in years. I have overcome the need to say " was I fat before?" when people give me the compliment "you have lost a LOT of weight". I know they mean well, but it makes you wonder if you were a behemoth before. I know this cannot have been true because my mother would have pointed it out. Now she is saying the words one longs to hear " Don't lose any more. Your face is started to show it". My mother is a true piece of work. Sitting beside her at my nephew's football game, she took a moment to compliment me on my skin. " Your skin really is pretty. It is because I kept you out of the sun." Before I could say thanks for preventing me from appearing on beaches in Girls Gone Wild or even allowing me to put babyoil and iodine on my transparent flesh, she says "But you are going to HAVE to have some work done SOON".  I digress. I was able to work my groove and show all what is the Fabulous Ma'am. It's a good thing.

 Like most Southern people, family is the most important and sometimes stressful thing in the world.This Christmas was very low on drama and very high on happiness. I loved being with my family. I have 5 beautiful (I am not biased. Everyone KNOWS this is true) nieces and nephews. They range in age from 22 to 11 and are all taller than me. My 3 nephews crack me up now that they appear to be grown. Even our baby boy is the size of a grown man but still just an angel. He is the gentle giant and a great source of joy. He was going to spend the night with me since I have a Playstation 3 and don't know how to use it.(The oldest nephew was the consultant on the audiovisual requirements for my sunroom). My tiny tot was so excited that her hero was going to spend the night that she had great plans of staying up allnight with him and playing on the PS3. Until he checked to see if his LittleDarling grandmother was staying. When told  she was going home with BigDaddy, he decided he wouldn't stay either. He is 7 inches taller than she is, but still wants her near.  I guess I will have to learn "Call to Duty. Special Ops" on my own.
In between Divine Design and Housewives of Atlanta.  Now, I must pause and ask the question" Where are the white people in Atlanta? And also, since 3 of these women are not even married, how can they be housewives? ALSO, that big white woman with the wig is engaged to a married man.She obviously has no breeding at all or else she would have some pride and sneak around. Just saying.
Back to me:
My nieces look alike, both over 5'9 and slender. They realize how cool I am and I love to be with them. My older niece, Tunisa, has a new apartment and was almost in tears of joy when she opened her new red Crockpot! Little did she know the excitement would be out of control when she unwrapped the 12piece Martha Stewart Collection of cookware in red enamel. The pinnacle of rapture happened when the red Osterizer completed her kitchen.   She only cook Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, so was bummed when her mother asked for her can opener ,something she had yet to find a need for, while they cooked. Poor child.
My El Debarge is the poster child for FOREVER 21. She has the ability to make an outfit out of a hefty bag and have people stop her on the street for fashion tips. The child is a designer in the making. While she looks like a model, she is really a comedian who likes to make distorted faces to amuse us . especially when her mother is trying to get portraits done for the family. El Debarge is a loony toon who makes me smile.
Every year I keep a diary of Christmas. This year my middle nephew, Dodie Al Fayed, wanted to make sure I included that he was the driver on the beer run with his older cousin, Happy. Now Happy is 22 years old and asked permission if he could go and buy beer. Rebel without a cause. I smile when I think that this is a grown man but  still stops and ask permission to get a brewsky..

I have a tiny one who calls me Ma'am. When she was learning to talk, my mother told me the way to make sure Southern children have manners is when they say "yes" or "no" you answer back with "Yes, Ma'am". I did such a good  job that the child calls me Ma'am. All the neighborhood children call me that as well. Since Southern children cannot call anyone by their first name without using Miss infront of it,  I am Miss Ma'am. Or as Trixie calls me, The Fabulous Ma'am.

Well, my friends are calling so I better go get the ice cream maker started. Doing Bellinis in it.